Monday, November 1, 2010

Happy 30th birthday Cynthia-the mircle-God's gift to Gail



First a baby who loves her mother so much--then a daughter who loves her mother so much and finally a mother who loves her daughter so much!!!   God is good.

Today is a very special day.  My Cynthia turns 30.  The fact that she turns 30 is not special but the story of how Cynthia came into this world is a miracle, a gift and a blessing.  The story goes like this:

In the fall of 1974 the world seemed to be so wonderful.  We had John (5), Travis (3) and Aaron (1).  We wanted more children and we wanted a girl.  Gail was of course so happy with our family but she certainly looked forward to having a daughter, someone she could raise in the likeness of herself and someone she could relate to as a woman and mother.  Disaster struck in the fall.  I was asked to attend a conference in Fargo and I begged Gail to come with me so we could spend time together in the evenings.  Grandma and grandpa Saunders agreed to take the 3 boys so we could enjoy some time apart from parenting.  It would be the first time ever we had done that.  The first night in Fargo Gail started to feel sick.  In the next couple of hours she would say she was really sick and then would feel better.  In between times as the TV was on Gail became frighten and said she saw the Devil on TV.  We knew no doctors in Fargo but finally we had to go to the ER room.  For the next 10 days Gail got sicker and sicker and they could not diagnose what was wrong.  Finally we changed hospitals and she had surgery.  She had been in the hospital for those days with a burst appendices and it was slowly slowly killing her.  She ended up staying in the hospital for 4 weeks, she lost 25 pounds and would suffer for the next 2-3 years from scar tissue etc.  The doctor also said that it was good we had our little family because there was major damage to organs and there would be no more children.  This news was heart breaking for Gail as the dream of a larger family and the dream of a daughter was gone.  For the next 3 years we lived with the idea of no more children but then in the summer of 1977 we decided to look into adoption.  At this same time we begin to look into moving to St. Paul from our home in Devils Lake ND.  In August of 1977 we stopped in Fargo on our way to St. Paul to discuss adopting a little girl from South America.  In the end we felt that our move made things so busy that adoption would be put on hold.  For 3 years we settled into St. Paul, the boys in new schools, me in a new job and of course we became very very involved in People of Praise Christian Community.  During that time adoption came up infrequently and both of us kind of settled in to the idea that a family of 3 boys was fine.  One morning in February I woke and in a strange but powerful way I knew Gail was pregnant and I knew God would bless us with our little girl.  As I dressed for school I became excited to tell Gail.  I hurried downstairs and announced to her that she was pregnant.  She burst into tears and became very angry.  She went on to explain how difficult it was for her to accept no more children and then when she finally had kind of accepted it here I was making a joke of it.  I tried to explain but needed to get to school and I left with my wonderful Gail angry, frustrated and in tears.  That day I came home for lunch with fear that Gail would still be upset with me.  No she said she was fine but please no more talk like that.  I said really honey you are pregnant.  A week or two later she thought maybe that was true and sure enough she was expecting.  No tests, no anything but we knew God was giving us a little girl so several times in the next months I would come home with pink this and pink that.  Well 30 years ago today Cynthia came into our world and Gail's dream had come true. 
I must say that for sure John,Travis and Aaron are just as special as Cynthia but to have such a wonderful God who was so generous as to give Gail a daughter is just a miracle.  I could go on and on about the dresses the first few years, the refusal to wear them as she got older, the times that were so so special and of course the times that were not perfect!!!  I would say that Gail's relationship with Cynthia really begin to come into focus as she graduated from high school and after that with each day it seemed to get better and better and more special and more special.  Of course I can remember times when Gail was not that happy with Cynthia but mostly I remember how proud she was, how thankful she was and how much she appreciated God's gift to her.  As I write this I do not mean to down play my relationship with Cynthia as having a daughter is very special to me too but for Gail it was the ultimate gift of life that God gave her.  It certainly was another gift as she was able to be there during the birth of her first granddaughter.
I can not say a lot more.  God is good, he is loving and for that I am so thankful.
Happy birthday Cynthia.  You are special, you are such a wonderful mother and wife, you are beautiful and I am so thankful and so proud to say you are my daughter.  I love you.

1 comment:

Anne said...

Thank you for sharing this story with us.