Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The plastic man

You have heard of the bag lady? Well I have become the plastic man. I have almost TWO bags full of plastic containers that people have given me full of food. The support is tremendous from every one I know but the plastic man!!!!!

I realized a new thing last night. I have nobody to talk to, actually I mean nobody to bounce things off of. If I have a thought or an insight or even a complaint (yes I often fall) there is only the 4 walls to talk to. Sure the thoughts bounce off the walls and come back in the same way they left. At least Gail came back with confirmation or a "what if" or I disagree!

Several people came over last night for the game. They came over because in the house there is a HD television and HD reception! It was fun and it went well but as you may guess it was very empty. I tried my best to be "the host" and I think I did about a B- job but of course there was an empty feeling all night long. For most of the evening I forgot about our Gail of the last few weeks and I remembered our Gail who was the consummate hostess, the queen of the house and the selfless gal who served and loved all. The image was glorious but the reality was she was so so missed. I did think that perhaps that is a way for me to allow the image of Gail those last days to fade, not go away, but just fade so I can recall but they are not at the forefront. My desire is that when I remember Gail I first think of the giggle and that infectious smile and then if I want I can remember how she was the last weeks of her life.

I woke up to a cold rainy day. It looks like we are expecting cool temps this week. I do not know where that Indian summer went, maybe it will come later. I do have a few storm windows to put on and of course many many things should be done by tomorrow!! I am thinking that with high temps now in the 40s or 50s it may be time for the air conditioners to come out!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I can't imagine you being a B- host. In my book you're an A+++++++.