For Carmen--A new beginning--A new journey: I wouldn't go there

Monday, December 7, 2009

I wouldn't go there

One could be tempted to say oh for the good old days. I thought about that and decided I will not go there. How could I "want" for the good old days? If I were to do that maybe Gail would have decided to not marry me, maybe I wouldn't have lived in St. Paul, maybe I would not have 7 children(3 by marriage), maybe I would not have 6+ grandchildren, maybe those blessed wonderful 41 years with Gail would turn out to be with nobody! No I will take where I am today having been blessed with so much in family, friends and community. Now if the "good old days" could take me back to good health for Gail and the dream of living into old age with her I would take that in a nanosecond.
The picture was taken in the summer of 1966 and that is me with my beloved Harley Sprint which was my only transportation until I married Gail. In those days I lived for the rides that we would go on and Gail would hang on to my waist so tight. Even though I loved my cycle so much the day we were married I gave it to my dad and having Gail instead of my cycle was the best thing I ever did.
I am still in the half work, half lazy mode today. I did some things but not enough yet. Travis, Cynthia and Faustina were here for some time this morning and that was good. I am upset with Cynthia because she left too much delicious lefsa and I am going to get fat!! I took a walk and ended up sitting in a book store and reading wood magazines for a while. I also bought some of Regina Candy's home make candy canes. I usually order them but forgot and I could not believe they had 4 left so that is all I got. I also stopped at Davanni's with a $20 gift that was dated Dec 19, 2006. They actually took it and gave me the balance in cash. So I had lunch and walked away with $12 in my pocket.
I put out much for the recycle again. That is so nice to be able to recycle things. I am guessing that I put out about 30 boxes that I took apart and another 10 bags of papers. I will be happy when that kind of work is finished. I think I am getting a bit burned out on recycling etc.
I think it had better be back to work.

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The first reading at Gail's funeral September 18, 2009

I know of no one who fit this better than Gail

Proverbs 31: 10-31
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm.
all the days of her life.
She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She sets about her work vigorously:
her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her;
Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Well done good and faithful servant, your praise is much and your reward is to be with God forever.

Our Story

Our story begin in 1951, when Carmen was 4 and Gail was 5! We met as our parents were at a camera club. Fast forward--Carmen begin to attend grade school in town in 1957, the same school that Gail went to. Fast forward--We had our first date in the winter of 1964 in Gail's senior year of high school. Again--we were married June 1st of 1968. We moved to St. Paul in October of 1977 and lived at 2094 Niles Ave until Gail's death September 14 of 2009.
Gail first breast cancer was found in October of 2003. After surgery, chemo, radiation and infusions for a year she felt well and we lived life in our normal mode. Carmen retired in June of 2007 and shortly after that we quit doing the paper route as well. In the fall of 2007 we went on our dream vacation. We camped for 7 weeks in Prince Edward Island and Nova Scotia and in the New England states. Sleeping in our truck and eating over an open fire we felt that we had experienced heaven. Then in January of 2008 we spent 3 weeks in Hawaii with friends and again had so much fun. In the fall of 2008 we did much work on the outside of the house and we were so excited to enter 2009 with big plans and dreams. In January Gail was diagnosed with new cancer. For the next 7 1/2 months we prayed, changed our life style, laughed and cried often. As the end of Gail's life drew near she was peaceful and family cared for her at home until she met Jesus. It was a journey that was wonderful, exciting, blessed, full of life and full of love but of course it was too short. Gail is so missed but I know she is in a better place so my journey must continue on without my true love.
I enter a new decade as the "I" that I never wanted to be but I have hope. Hope of things not experienced and hope that life will again, in 2010, become something that I look forward to each morning. My hope is based on our Lord who gives all, who is all and who gives love to all who believe. I enter this new decade with so many questions and so few answers but with faith that all will be well.

For Carmen--A new beginning--A new journey

Monday, December 7, 2009

I wouldn't go there

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The first reading at Gail's funeral September 18, 2009

Our Story

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