For Carmen--A new beginning--A new journey: Another day in the world of "I"

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Another day in the world of "I"

I am not sure if I posted this picture before. This was taken in Wisconsin in 1983 in June but as you can see it was a bit cold.
For those who read this I will not be blogging until Wednesday night.
I got my steps into day again. I am finding that walking like that gives me time alone and I can think. Now I must cut down on my eating so I lose some weight. It is funny as I grew up in the country and I love the quiet of the country but for some reason when I walk I like to walk where there are people and things happening. It seems that I can tune the noise out but there is comfort in that. It seems strange but it is true.
Again I went to 7:00 AM church. I do not like to go to church alone but 7:00 AM is the best time. It is just very difficult to be alone during that time. As I walked into church I was behind a couple who were holding hands. For a moment I was jealous but then I was able to thank God that they could do that. The tears came often during church but I guess that is OK.
I finished printing out the letter I will give to neighbors for my open house December 11. I will also invite a few others as well. I do hope at least some people come in Gail's honor and also to celebrate the season.
I have decided to put Gail's and my picture on my Christmas letter. I think it will be OK to do that this year. If that is not the right thing to do I expect the Lord or friends to let me know. I have not written the letter yet but it will be short.
I drove to Richfield to get some candles for my Advent log. I took a birch log and drilled holes in it for the 4 candles. I actually think it looks quit nice. I will pray for many things but for sure I will pray for God's grace during these days ahead. I sent a note to the kids today. I mentioned that we need to take a family picture at Christmas. As much as I would like not to do that I think we should.
Once again I have several things to put out for the recycle person. That probably will continue for some time.
I continue to have difficulty sleeping. I am not sure why but last night I woke up about 5 times.
I was surprised this afternoon as I opened the blog and saw that there was a comment on it. My heart just was so excited. I did not realize that a comment would make me so happy.
I do need to do several things before tomorrow so best be going. I will blog next on Wednesday evening.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...: Carmen,

I will read your blog as long as you continue to blog. I encourage you to do it as long as you like. You share your life so openly that it is an inspiration. Yours is a journey we will all take at one time or another. Thanks for helping us understand the journey.; November 29, 2009 at 11:19 PM
Connie said...: In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I am very thankful for your honesty in sharing your life with all of us through the blog. I am thankful that each day is a new opportunity and each day comes with new mercy because it seems most days I use up all of mine and part of some very good person who has leftovers.; November 30, 2009 at 9:42 AM

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The first reading at Gail's funeral September 18, 2009

I know of no one who fit this better than Gail

Proverbs 31: 10-31
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm.
all the days of her life.
She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She sets about her work vigorously:
her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her;
Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Well done good and faithful servant, your praise is much and your reward is to be with God forever.

Our Story

Our story begin in 1951, when Carmen was 4 and Gail was 5! We met as our parents were at a camera club. Fast forward--Carmen begin to attend grade school in town in 1957, the same school that Gail went to. Fast forward--We had our first date in the winter of 1964 in Gail's senior year of high school. Again--we were married June 1st of 1968. We moved to St. Paul in October of 1977 and lived at 2094 Niles Ave until Gail's death September 14 of 2009.
Gail first breast cancer was found in October of 2003. After surgery, chemo, radiation and infusions for a year she felt well and we lived life in our normal mode. Carmen retired in June of 2007 and shortly after that we quit doing the paper route as well. In the fall of 2007 we went on our dream vacation. We camped for 7 weeks in Prince Edward Island and Nova Scotia and in the New England states. Sleeping in our truck and eating over an open fire we felt that we had experienced heaven. Then in January of 2008 we spent 3 weeks in Hawaii with friends and again had so much fun. In the fall of 2008 we did much work on the outside of the house and we were so excited to enter 2009 with big plans and dreams. In January Gail was diagnosed with new cancer. For the next 7 1/2 months we prayed, changed our life style, laughed and cried often. As the end of Gail's life drew near she was peaceful and family cared for her at home until she met Jesus. It was a journey that was wonderful, exciting, blessed, full of life and full of love but of course it was too short. Gail is so missed but I know she is in a better place so my journey must continue on without my true love.
I enter a new decade as the "I" that I never wanted to be but I have hope. Hope of things not experienced and hope that life will again, in 2010, become something that I look forward to each morning. My hope is based on our Lord who gives all, who is all and who gives love to all who believe. I enter this new decade with so many questions and so few answers but with faith that all will be well.

For Carmen--A new beginning--A new journey

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Another day in the world of "I"

2 comments:

The first reading at Gail's funeral September 18, 2009

Our Story

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