Sunday, November 1, 2009

Slow down

As I tossed and turned in bed last night I tried to figure out how I can slow down my mind. Each time I would wake up I would think of something to do, some place I needed to go, someone I needed to call, yard work left undone and the list goes on. I need to figure it out soon as I am tired this morning.
Twenty-nine years ago this morning Gail and I got ready to go to a meeting. As we pulled into the parking lot mid morning Gail said we had better turn around and go to the hospital. Her water broke before we got there and I dropped her off in the emergency driveway. By the time I parked and arrived in the birthing room Cynthia had arrived. Today, at the age of 29, she is this lovely young lady with 2 precious little ones and a fine husband. I would almost give anything if Gail could be here today but it is not to be so we will have to celebrate without mother. That is difficult to do but we will give it our best effort and we will give the Lord thanks for all he has blessed us with in the past 29 years.
I think I continue to be in the infant stages of figuring out who I am, how I should live and what should I do. After spending 40+ years molding my individualism into one with Gail it now is a daunting task to step back and figure out who I am. The last time I was an individual (I say that with NO regrets) was when I was an 18 year old green behind the ears. I mean I was so green I have come to believe there was some mold there! Today I have 7 children (3 are by marriage), 6 2/3 grandchildren, 41 years of marriage behind me, 38 years in education behind me and I am brand new. It is almost not believable. It is an experience that I never wanted for myself but it is here so I will try to make lemonade out of lemons. For some reason that expression has new meaning.

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