Monday, November 16, 2009

Those wonderful grade school days!

I think Gail is about 2nd or 3rd grade here. I can now see where we have such cute grandchildren!! You can see the old army truck in the back and I am sure that is the truck that her dad was driving when Gail was run over and could have easily lost her life. As it was her leg was broken. I bet she is clutching those books because she does not want the dog to eat her homework.
Not a lot happened in the last 1/2 day. I still have trouble sleeping unless I take something which I don't really like to do. Was up at 3 this morning and not able to get back to sleep.
I will put out a lot more for the recycle truck today.
I am trying a few different things in the arrangement of the downstairs, I will see if I like it or not. I would like to move things so I can do my computer work etc. on the first floor but not at the dining room table. I can not really figure out how the house should look with ONLY me in it. I do think that it needs some changes from how it served Gail and I. I wish the house could stay the same to serve both of us but what one wants and what one gets is often different as I have experienced the last several months.
I have found that I need to be really careful as it is easy for me to observe couples and be sad or question God. I do know that is wrong and each time it happens I ask God to forgive me and be patient as I am trying my best. God told me he created me and of course my best effort is fine with him.
I have found reproducing old pictures of Gail is so fun, so enlightening and also so emotional. It does sound strange but really I did not realize how cute she was. Like I have said in the past that darn cute head band was THE thing!! I say that and I don't even think it is a bias opinion. The one thing I notice in her childhood pictures as well as pictures of our family when they were young is that Gail is always smiling, she is always enjoying life and it seems that she is passing that gift of life to those she is with. Of the 100's of pictures of our kids almost all of them picture them with smiles, not made up but real ones!!!
I haven't really smiled much lately but I will try to change that as time goes on. I certainly was not smiling yesterday when I was at Ikea.
We have our annual camp wrap up meeting tonight at my place and I have much to do so it is off to clean, order and prepare.

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