Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Time for some home made cranked ice cream
I think I am into one of those weeks where there will be triggers all over the place. I traveled to the fair grounds to start the paper work for work there for this year. It was Gail's idea that we work the fair after I retired so we signed up in July of 07. At the time we had our choice of two kinds of work during the fair. One was the park and ride and the other was cleaning bathrooms! Guess which we picked! That led to doing other parking duty during the summer. So driving there today the eyes were quit blurry and the tissue box was close at hand. Then it got worse---I went to look at monuments. Isn't it a quick snap shot of life as we await new life in Aaron/Amy's family and prepare to purchase something for Gail's grave site all in the same week. Actually the big cry came in the afternoon. I received a package from sisters Helen and Joan. Inside was a pound of Kona Coffee from Hawaii. Helen had fooled me a while back by saying she was changing her coffee habits and what kind did I like the best. Man I swallowed that line totally, I blame it on the numbness after Gail's death. If that is NOT the case I am losing a step or two and it is just too early for that to happen so Gail it is your fault. For some reason the tears streamed down when I opened it. I don't think it was happiness for the coffee, although it is the BEST, but rather it was the love, the idea behind it all. Anyway I got over that and then took an afternoon nap. Later I worked some more in my bedroom. I finally got down to a fairly large box and said I just could not make decisions or handle it any more so I filled the box and it is sitting in one closet for another day. I do however now have a fairly orderly and neat room to sleep in.
I like to talk about "God moments" which for me is a short short time when a person feels God so so so near. I was thinking of those moments today and realized that each time Gail and I would walk to the Winds for a meal, that was a God Moment. We usually brought something and I would carry that in one hand and then we would always hold hands. We never talked about it but those were special God moments. The walking hand in hand with Gail was part of it and the anticipation of having a meal with the Winds was the other part. I am so thankful for those times and it makes Gail's memory so sweet and her loss so great.
I also remembered something else yesterday. For much of December and January I had been wearing long johns and staying so cozy warm even in the house when it was 66. Well I stopped wearing them about a week ago as the weather was so warm. Yesterday I took a walk outside with a breeze and temp of 20. Suddenly I realized I needed my long johns which I had forgotten about so today it is faze two of long john season.